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Castlevania
Sonic For Hire: Castlevania is the seventh episode of the seventh season of the Sonic For Hire series and is the eighty-fifth episode overall. In this episode, Sonic and co. explore Dracula's castle to search for another clue. Plot Sonic, Tails, Jim, and Eggman are schlepping through some dark and foreboding game. Sonic asks Tails if he knows what he's doing. Tails is 100% certain. Since the first clue involved something that "was once dark and shifty" that proceeded to become "worn yet shiny", Tails proceeded to put two and two together and does not get 4, but another answer: vampires. To that end, the guys have entered Castlevania, and have approached the gates of Dracula's castle. Eggman interjects to state that vampires are not ''lame, asking if they've all seen Edward's abs. Jim calls Eggman a strange character. Tails explain that Dracula must have the next clue to find the Creator, so the guys must find him before Simon Belmont kills him. He proposes that the guys split up into teams, with Sonic automatically making the teams into "Cool Guys" and "Nerds". Tails, taking the role of a "Cool Guy", invites fellow "Cool Guy" Jim to "hunt the fuck out of Dracula" and head off. Sonic finds it adorable that those two think that they're cool. Sonic and Eggman have appeared to have entered some sort of rec room in the castle. Despite only searching one room, Sonic is already exhausted, bemoaning that they'll never find Dracula. Eggman spots him as soon as Sonic finishes talking. The two are surprised, and Eggman begs Dracula not to turn them into vampires... unless they get ripped abs. Amazingly, Dracula refuses to kill them. He's just pleased to have visitors. He tosses them cans of ''Castlevanian ''beer, prompting Sonic to admit that living in a castle is "the fucking tits!" Eggman begins to remember that they needed to ask the vampire something, but forgets what it is when scantily clad waitresses bring out Jell-O shots. Back with Jim and Tails, the two are seen battling horde after horde of undead monstrosities. Tails likes the direction that they're going, mentioning that they just have to clear out a couple dozen more rooms, and they'll start getting close to Dracula. Eggman tosses Dracula a can of his beer, which he chugs by puncturing the can with his fangs. Sonic is having the time of his life, wishing that it would never end. Dracula grimly mentions that such a feat can be arranged. Sonic and Eggman have no qualms about this, and want to become undead. Suddenly, an exhausted Jim and Tails arrive, confused and angry at the hedgehog and doctor for finding Dracula before they could. Dracula, drunk off his ass, sees Tails as a beautiful woman, one who he wants to hide "bats in her belfry". Tails is even more confused when Dracula is drunk. Simon Belmont then bursts in, having fought through endless waves of monsters. Tails mentions that they already battled their way through monsters and found Dracula. Sonic mentions that he should've looked in the rec room, since they found him immediately. Simon ignores them, and mentions that he must kill Dracula to avenge his family. Before he can make good on his word, Sonic shoots him. Dracula is delighted that the guys have saved his life, and offers to let Sonic have Tails' butt while he gets the mouth. Sonic politely declines, and asks the vampire if he has a clue to find the Creator. Dracula remembers that he does in fact have a clue, and after chugging another beer, tells the guys what it is: '"To find the Creator, you need the half-naked man!"' The vampire readies himself to put his "wooden stake" (dick) into Tails' "heart" (butt), and then passes out. Tails, in a deadpan voice, confirms that Sonic and Dracula were gonna tag team him. "For the quest, Tails." Sonic replies. "For the quest." Character Appearances *Sonic the Hedgehog *Miles "Tails" Prower *Dr. Eggman *Earthworm Jim *Dracula (debut) *Simon Belmont (debut) Transcript ''To be added. Video To be uploaded. Category:Episodes Category:Season 7 Category:Character Introduction